'Splosion Man - Xbox Live Arcade

I know I’m a little late to the party with this review, and I made my thoughts on this game pretty clear in the comments on Trial Runs, but you know what, this game deserves to be talked about further. However since it’s been out for two weeks almost, I’m sure you know most of the details. Therefore we’re going to try something a little different, so bear with me.

Before I go any further, allow me to quickly summarize my thoughts on the game: ridiculously fun, very addicting, funny as all hell and lots of replay value. For 10 bucks there really is absolutely no reason not to own this (Drea and Curtis!!).

So what I thought I would do here is instead of spending paragraph after paragraph detailing how awesome this game is, I’m going to shake things up a little bit and do a top ten list. This could be the first and last one of these so if you enjoy it, cling to it mercilessly because another one might not be coming.

Shawn’s Top Ten Stupid Things You COULD Spend 10 Bucks On, But Would be Way Stupider than Buying ‘Splosion Man

10. Gas. Why are you even going anywhere when you could stay home and play ‘Splosion Man?

9. Groceries. No sir. You hit up the Taco Bell value menu if you need food. That should leave you with more cash in your pocket to start ‘sploding….until the Taco Bell hits later and you will be doing some “‘sploding” either way (yes that’s right, poop jokes).

8. Going to the movies. ‘Splosion Man gets you hours of entertainment for 10 bucks. A movie will give you 3 hours tops, and that’s probably not even true since I assume you’re watching Transformers 2. For shame….

7. Razors. First of all, guys when the hell did razors become so damn expensive? Second of all, I read somewhere girls love huge lumberjack beards. So feel free to let it grow. And girls, remember Without A Paddle? That girl was totally still hot with unshaved legs, so don’t worry too much.

6. Gifts. If you do in fact have a birthday or wedding coming up, then this is simple to get around. Take whatever you were going to buy and find something 10 dollars cheaper. Planning to put 100 dollars in a card? Change that 100 dollar bill into 4 twenties and a ten. Tacky? Sure. But you won’t care, ‘Splosion Man is too good to care.

5. Loved Ones. If they don’t love you enough to understand you needed to buy this game, then it wasn’t going to work out anyway. Besides you ever see Fatal Attraction? You don't need that.

4. Socks. I don’t care how many times people say that socks with gaping holes in them are tacky and garbage. They’re just jealous your foot can breathe better than theirs.

3. Other Games. Does any other game feature that amazing donut song? No they don’t. That’s what I thought, SHUT UP!

2. A book. NEEEEEEEEEEERRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

And number 1…..

Saving it. Saving money is for pussies. Real men and women piss it all away the second they get it. You don’t need to save for a rainy day. Spend it now and spend that rainy day playing ‘Splosion Man.

So there you have it. You now have literally no excuse not to buy this game. It seriously is fantastic and a ton of fun so you should go and download it immediately. You will not regret it.