October's Daily Horror Dose 4: Retaliation- Day #13 - Zombeavers

Originally Zombeavers was going to come right after Cooties but the idea of doing 4 zombie themed movies in a row didn’t sit completely right with me so I had to toss something else into the middle. Now that I got that temporary reprieve, it’s back to the world of zombies. This time we have zombie beavers. Zombeavers. Yep.

This feels like the kind of movie that is brought up in the middle of a drunken conversation with your friends. “Haha! You know what would be real stupid? Like, if a beaver became a zombie. Cuz it’s got those teeth man! Like for biting and shit!” “They would be Zombeavers bro!” “Holy shit dude you should totally make that movie!” The crazy thing here though is that they did actually go on to make that movie. So kudos to them for seeing it through and it’s cool it exists but I don’t know if the world really needed zombeavers.

Do I even need to explain the plot? Three girls go to a cabin. They have a creepy run-in with a redneck dude and eventually their boyfriends show up and scare/surprise them. One of the guys recently cheated on one of the girls, maybe that girl is one of the core group, maybe not, who cares. Eventually zombie beavers attack them. I mean outside of that it’s all one huge cliché and the movie is definitely fully aware of that.

I don’t think it’s going to blow your mind when I saw that Zombeavers is far more focused on comedy than it is on horror. As much as I would like to see the version of this story that is played completely straight, it was never going to happen. My biggest complaint is the same I have for many horror comedies – it’s just not that funny. There’s a few good lines and bits here and there, and I did like the two (almost definitely improvised) scenes that bookend the movie. I also can’t help but respect the lounge styled theme song during the end credits. Largely though the movie hinges on the singular joke that they are dealing with zombie beavers. They do get a surprising amount of mileage out of that one joke, and they were wise enough to keep the movie short, clocking in at a brisk 75 minutes or so. Oh and the beaver puppets themselves are appropriately stupid, so I enjoyed that as well. Ok so maybe it’s a little funnier than I gave it credit for a few sentences ago.

I know it’s a comedy and I know as a result we shouldn’t expect much in the way of characters, but boy every single member of the core group here, with maybe one exception, is just the worst human being. These are not fun people to watch and I suppose that’s partly so you don’t care when they suffer a gruesome death at the hands (paws? feet?) of zombie beavers (you will likely be actively rooting for this to happen as I certainly was), but it doesn’t make for the most pleasurable viewing experience since you still have to spend a decent amount of time with these people. One of them (SPOILERS FOR ZOMBEAVERS!) kills a doggie. That is easily the most upsetting death in the movie.

Zombeavers does deliver on a few fronts. There are copious amounts of nudity (all provided by the same actress but still) and gore. Also the fate of those who are bitten is appropriately gross and silly. I mean it delivers exactly what you would expect it to really. If that sounds cool, I say screw it, give it a shot. At the very least it will be over quickly.